"Lost"

My son is a huge fan of the T.V. show, "Lost". I hear it is a good show, but I haven't gotten into it. But the concept fascinates me. Not that I have some strange desire to end up crashed on a remote island but I like the fact that the show is really about second chances, renewal, and redemption (At least, that is what I hear it is about!). Plus, I think we all get lost during our lives. Let me give you some prime examples:

1. My son, Jonathan, started a new job a year ago working at Fry's Electronics. After being on the job a week he was quite frustrated because he didn't know where things were and how to help customers. He was feeling "lost". Now he is a Supervisor at the store and helps to supervise others who are helping customers find what they need. He is now the person they go to for help.
   
2. My wife, Joanie, is teaching school in Gardena, Ca. That's about a 30 mile commute in L.A. Joanie has to go through downtown L.A. to get to her school. That's a pretty daunting task for Midwestern gal. She has found her way through L.A. freeways and even gotten off them onto surface streets when the freeways are backed up. On more than one occasion she has gotten "lost" and had to find her way through strange territory in downtown L.A. Today, after less than a month, she is an "expert" at driving through L.A. The next time we have to go anywhere south, she is driving!
3. I had my first Hebrew class last night. In preparation for the class I read on my own the first two chapters of the grammar text, memorized the alphabet and some of the key issues related to how letters are changed, formed, written, and pronounced. I wanted to be prepared. I guess I was afraid if I didn't do it, I would be "lost". Guess what? If I hadn't done that I would have been totally and completely (you guessed it) "lost" for the whole first lecture. Instead, I was able to follow the course, get the information I needed, and am prepared for the first quiz which will be Thursday.

My point? Simply this. Everyone experiences the feelings of being lost. You don't know which decision to make, which road to take, which direction your life should follow. Don't panic. Lostness is one of the key ways in which God reveals himself. The Israelites were "lost" for 40 years in the Wilderness; Jesus was "lost" for 40 days in the desert; Paul was "lost" for 3 years before Barnabas came and "found" him for his missionary work; Abraham was "lost" but the Lord led him to a promised land. When you are lost you are on the verge finding. You see, lostness makes you dependent on God. You seek His counsel instead of your own wisdom. What do you do to prepare for being "lost"? You prepare to serve the Lord. Good times are really just preparation for tough times. If things are going really well for you spiritually, read the Bible more, spend more time in prayer, and get your personal spiritual life in order. Why? Because a time of lostness is coming. If you prepare now, you will know what to do then. And if you are living in a time of lostness that you really weren't prepared for - that's OK. Just become dependent now on the God of Light and He will lead you through the darkness. And then when things are good, remember to prepare for the next eclipse. Jesus was prepared to go to the Cross (his time of "lostness"). That's how he got through it and how we became part of the Kingdom. Be prepared!

Where Your Money Is

Well, I've registered for classes and begun the long and expensive process of buying books. Unlike my Master's level work where a professor might require 3-4 books, in the Ph.D. program the books pile up quite high (my seminar for the Fall semester require the 3 books the M.Div. students need plus 8 more just for Ph.D. students - 11 total). Over the next 10 weeks I will be required to read about 3,500 pages (350 per week) and write a 30 page paper on both the reading and the research. So far, I've purchased about half the books I need for the seminar and for Hebrew. Already the total has exceeded $250 for books and will approach $400 by the time it is all said and done. Add that to the tuition bill, parking permit, various campus fees and charges, and the cost becomes substantial. I know. I wrote the check for it all today.
Was it hard to write the check? Not really. No one wants to give away thousands of dollars but that's not how I have been looking at it. The bible says, "Give and it will be given to you, pressed down, shaken together all running over into your lap. For the measure you give is the measure you get back." Jesus also believed that "where you treasure is there will your heart be also." So, I wrote the check willingly. Believing that this is merely an investment in the future; in what God is doing in me and, eventually, through me.
On what do you spend the most amount of your money? Is it your mortgage? Well, what are you doing in your home that is an investment in your ministry today and in the future? Is it your car? How are you using your vehicle to reach out to others with the Gospel of Jesus Christ? Is it a vacation home? Appliances? Tuition for your kids schooling? Groceries? Whatever it is, remember this. You get what you pay for! Everyone invests their money in something. What is it that you are investing your treasure in? That is your priority in life. Does it really match up well with who you say you are?

What Am I Doing Here?

I sat and ate lunch today with about 50-75 Ph.D. students and professors as part of the orientation activities here at Fuller. They are a fascinating group of folks. Some already have one doctorate and are working on another; some have degrees from places as prestigious as Princeton; some have degrees from Cambridge in England - and those are the students not the professors. One of my new colleagues is proficient in Hebrew (I intend to make him my friend!) along with several other Semitic languages; another is working under a grant that has her displaying her artistic work in an L.A. museum; still another is head of the Campus Life ministry at Stanford University and is commuting each week from San Francisco to L.A. by plane. They are by any stretch of imagination, an impressive group of students, highly motivated, and extremely accomplished.
Then come the professors. One had just had a book published; another was just about finished with the first volume of a two-volume major work; several were working in conjunction with major religious denominations or organizations to write or consult with them about issues of extreme importance to the Christian community. They are experts in their respective fields and scholars who are so accomplished that they have been invited to be on the teaching staff of one of the most prestigious seminaries in the world and they are the men and women influencing the next generation of professors and scholars by mentoring people like me and my classmates through this long, arduous, and dangerous journey called graduate education.
Looking around the luncheon I couldn't help but wonder what I am doing here. My academic credentials are not nearly as strong as most of my colleagues or any of the professors. While I may not be the oldest student entering the program, I am close. I am no spring chicken, no eager young beaver trying to set out on a program to change the world. Who am I to be in such distinguished company? I'll tell you who I am. I am a child of the King, chosen by His Spirit to travel down this road. I cannot tell you why He chose me, but I know He chose me. And that is enough.
The next time you are "chosen" to take on some task at work or some ministry at church; the next time someone places a confidence in you and your abilities or character that, in your own mind, exceeds who you are and what you can do; the next time you face a situation where the mountain seems to high or the valley seems too low, take heart my friend and ask one very simple question. Does He want you to go? Is the Spirit the one who is leading you down this path? Has the God of the Universe determined that of all the servants of His that He could choose, He has chosen you? Then, that is enough. And in a room full of scholars or a business filled with highly competent workers or in a church that has more qualified and mature followers of Christ, remember this one truth. If God is for you, who can be against you? If God has called you how can you fail if you remain faithful to His call and close to His will? This thing called mission and ministry is not about your ability nor is about your inability. It is about one thing. Your availability. It's about His strength and your weakness that creates dependence on Him rather than independence of Him and dependence on yourself. In short, it's not about you. It's about God. And I think He knows what He is doing!

Renewing Your Passion

One of the oddities about pursuing a doctorate in preaching full-time is that you have to give up preaching. After spending the last 31 years (or, at least, most of it) preaching every Sunday, I am in a situation where I no longer preach. As a matter of fact, after resigning from my pastoral duties in Fresno, I had only one other assignment to preach and that was in September (I finished my assignment at the end of July). So, after all those years of preaching weekly, I have been relegated to preaching “seldomly”. And I say, “Thank God”. But not for the reasons you might think.
First of all, I enjoy preaching. It is my passion. To be away from a pulpit is not fulfilling to me. Secondly, preaching is an art that must be practiced in order to be improved. While my wife may or may not enjoy hearing me preach at her when we are home, it does not quite equate with preaching to a congregation. Thirdly, preaching is a discipline that keeps your grounded in the Word and faithful to the “whole counsel” of God. So, considering these things, why would I say, “Thank God”?
Someone has said that a routine is just a grave with the ends knocked out. After 3 decades of preaching, there is a danger that it becomes routine. The preacher begins to do “formula” preaching rather than really dealing with the depths of the Word. It is easy to get into the habit if allowing sermon preparation to substitute for the richness of studying the Word of God for personal insight and pleasure. It is also easy to become reliant on your technique and your process rather than relying on the Spirit of God to be your inspiration and your insight. By preaching with less frequency, I find that I am seeing things in a fresh new way. God is continuing to give me opportunities to preach (I have another assignment at a local church in early October and a series of sermons to preach in Ohio in January of next year). Now, because of the infrequency, I am finding renewed passion and joy in both the preparation and experience of the sermon.
What have you been doing for a long time? What has become “routine” in your life? What did you use to depend upon God for but find yourself doing now in your own power and might? How easy it is to become dependant on nothing except your own abilities! What have you done in your life and ministry with passion but find that it is now being done by formula and routine? Maybe it’s time to step away from it for a while. Let the batteries recharge. Don’t give it up forever or step away permanently. I find that this is the choice most church members make and it is frustrating. The solution to renewing your passion is not quitting your passion! The solution is to find ways to renew your mind and review your procedures. Having preached once in the last 6 weeks, I can tell you I am looking forward to being in the pulpit in a couple of weeks. Thank God he has given me the gift of stepping away from my passion in order to draw closer to it!

It's All Hebrew to Me!

It’s All Hebrew to Me

One of the classes I am preparing to take is Hebrew. In order to fulfill the requirements of the Ph.D. program, every student has to have already taken both Greek and Hebrew (Fortunately, I took Greek as both an undergrad and in my Masters Degree program and have completed that requirement). In addition, everyone has to take another research language or two. But for now, my focus is Hebrew. Let me tell you a little bit about Hebrew, assuming most who read this have not had their bar mitzvah or chosen to study Hebrew on their own. Here goes:
As with any language study, you begin with the alphabet. The first thing that grabs you is the similarity of some of the letters. For instance, there are at least six different letters that are variations on the letter 7. Depending on how long the top line is or how straight the down stroke is or how long the down stroke is (combined with how long the upper stroke is) you get different letters. Five letters are written differently if they are at the end of the word. Several letters (called Begadkephat Letters) are pronounced differently depending on whether they have a dot in the middle of them or not (Begadkephat is a is a mnemonic device standing for the letters b, g, d, k, p, and t). Hebrew has no numbers so their alphabet stands for their numerical system as well. The first 9 consonants stand for numbers 1-9, the next 9 serve as 10-90, and the final 4 represent numbers 100-400. Sound confusing? By the way, did I mention that Hebrew is written from right to left – not left to right?
How do you learn this kind of stuff? Well, the first thing you have to do is suspend what you know and how you operate in English and realize that things are different in Hebrew. When I write, I have begun writing everything from right to left in my Hebrew studies. I want that to become normal for me. I am adjusting.
Second, don’t panic when things are different. For instance, a and b look a lot alike. So do b, d, g and p; how about n and m; try o and p – it’s just a line different. And in English, we have not 26 letters to memorize but 52. After all, a capital A and a lower case a are not very similar if you think of it. And how does someone tell the difference between a capital I and a lower case i? So, if you have mastered English, Hebrew may not be that hard. It’s all in your approach, in your attitude.
So many people have heard about the language study or going back into the classroom that I am attempting to do and have said things like, “I’m glad it’s you and not me” or “I couldn’t do that”. Such statements are often discouraging rather than uplifting. I have also concluded that language study like anything else is a matter of attitude not aptitude. For years I avoided the issue of language study because I did so poorly at it during my high school years. Well, I did poorly at a lot of things in high school that I have become quite adept at in my adult years (driving, egotism, and wisdom come to mind). I am convinced that learning at whatever level is a matter of attitude. If you are excited about learning, you will learn. If you are unsure about it, you will struggle. It’s like my Little League coach told us, “If you think you are going to strike out, you probably will”.
What challenge are you facing? What struggle do you have to overcome? While it might not solve every problem, remember this – your attitude determines your altitude. How high you go in life is determined by how your attitude is towards the challenge before you. Faith, it is said, is the ability to look at a problem and believe that God is bigger than the problem and that he is willing to help you overcome the challenge. I believe that. By the way, have I mentioned that all the vowels in Hebrew were added later and that, therefore, they are a series of dots rather than characters above or below the consonant? Sounds challenging. How exciting!

Balancing Act

I spent Sunday watching NFL football. For all you non-sports fans, I apologize. But for all of us who truly enjoy the sport, it was a magical day. As a boy I grew up rooting for and watching the Philadelphia Eagles play. Now, through the magic of the Dish Network, I am able to watch them again. It takes me back to simpler days and gives me a chance to daydream nostalgically about my childhood days.
I like to do that, don’t you? To remember fondly the days of my youth and what I did or did not do. Reminiscing about days gone by. But, like the old saying goes, “too much of a good thing can be a bad thing”. One of the great principles from the Bible is that we are to live lives of moderation. Now, some would say that the Word teaches we should live lives of sacrifice. While I certainly believe that sacrifice is both necessary and needed in life, I am not sure that this is how we are supposed to live. Much of the sacrifice we are called to make is to ensure that we are living lives of moderation. One of the definitions of sin that applies too much of what is taught in the Word is that sin is taking something that is either good or OK and making it overly important in your life. Let me give you a few examples:
1. Sex – God created sex. It is something that comes from Him to us. He has deemed it to be pleasurable. We are created to enjoy it. However, God realizes the powerful nature of the sexual urge and tells us to live moderately. The moderation of sex is not in its frequency but in it’s context. The moderation God calls on is moderation of when you should begin and with whom you should engage in sexual activity. There is no prohibition I know of in scripture against the frequency of sexual activity (I believe there are some prescriptions in the Law about refraining from sexual activity during a woman’s menstrual period, but that is for the comfort of the woman during a period of time when it can become painful or awkward).
2. Celebration in Worship – God inhabits the praises of His people. Part of what we should do in worship is to give Him praise and to celebrate His presence. Paul teaches the Corinthian church that even this noble activity must be done in moderation (an apparent critique of the excessively exuberant celebrations of the “tongues” crowd). Praise is good and necessary but it also must be done in moderation.
3. Giving – God loves a cheerful giver. But He teaches that even our giving should be in moderation. Now, it is true that the only proper way to give is to give God everything. And that we should do. However, from a “giving away” perspective (that is, what you give to the church to be disbursed for ministry in the Name of Christ), God teaches a tithe (10%). In other words, God commands even moderation in what we give while allowing us to make all that we can (as far as I know there is no prohibition against making only a certain amount of money). Now, for those who are gifted at making money there is a commensurate spiritual gift of giving that exceeds the 10% rule but it remains a moderation of the whole. These are just a few examples of the principle of moderation. That makes me thankful. When God had Adam and Eve in the Garden He told them to eat of all the trees, except one. Moderation. When the Apostle Paul was struck with his “thorn in the flesh” he said it was to prevent him from becoming “conceited” because of these great wondrous revelations he was receiving. Again, the principle seems to be that of moderating even blessings so that nothing in life is out of balance. So, while I have the NFL Ticket and can watch all games beginning with the ones that start at 10am on Sunday morning, I will still go to church. Why? Because all of life is to be in balance. Hmmm. I wonder if I can find a church that has a Saturday night service?

A Pain in the Back and a Joy in the Heart

I threw out my back last week. I want to tell you a little bit about it not so much to gain sympathy as to make a point. Here goes:
I was moving boxes and unpacking things when I felt the pain and anguish that I knew was my lower back going into spasm. I hit the floor and could not get up. Literally. I lay on the floor for about an hour before I could call for some help (I had to crawl about 12 feet to get to my phone). The help was simply to get me some pillows and the TV remote because I knew that getting up was not possible. Joanie called and I let her know what had happened. She is teaching at a school about an hour commute from here. So, I was stuck just laying on the floor. I stayed there until Sunday afternoon. After getting several treatments from a chiropractor who made house calls (how about that one!), I was able to get up and at least walk around. Now it is Tuesday and I am still hobbling, though I did manage to make it to her office for an adjustment. I am still sleeping on the floor and getting help from neighbors and others who are sympathetic to my situation. Eventually, I am sure I will be able to get back to normal but it will take some time. Joanie has been going to work every day so I have to fend for myself as best I can and get around as best as possible. So, here is my point:
Everyone should have to experience throwing out his or her back. I hope you will have such an experience – and that you will experience it very soon. No, I am not a sadist that desires for you to “fell my pain” or one who seeks revenge through another’s suffering. But I do believe that everyone should experience what I have gone through over these few days. Why? Well, I remember watching an episode of M.A.S.H where Hawkeye is blinded by an explosion. The temporary situation gave Hawkeye an incredible series of experiences that he would never have known had he not been blind. By the end of the episode, his sight returns and he is a changed man by virtue of what he has come to know. It is in that sense that I wish you a lower lumbar failure in your future.
We are so self-reliant as a race. In past years, being an agrarian culture, people knew what it was like to be dependant rather than independent. This fostered a real sense of community, comradely, and interdependence. Lying on the floor for days meant I could do nothing to really help myself. I could not get up for anything. Anything! What a wife I have! I have come to realize the importance of interdependence in our society. For the first time in my adult life, I am not pastoring a church. I am living in an apartment complex with other students and their families. I know almost no one and nothing about the Pasadena area. And yet, I have been able to get around, find out what is necessary, where to go, and received untold amounts of help from my new neighbors. One of them saw me today attempting to go out to the van to go to the chiropractor’s office and she ended up not only helping into the van but driving her car to the chiropractors office and helping me get out of the van and into the office (my chiropractor has to be the only chiropractor in the universe who’s office is on the second floor with no elevator! I am learning anew what Hawkeye learned on M.A.S.H. – that we our never self-reliant creatures but we are always in need of others and dependant upon the help of strangers.
In that sense I have come to understand the parable Jesus tells about the Good Samaritan. I understand the story now from the vantage point of the man who was beaten, helpless and left for dead. Without the help of others he was totally helpless. Unable to move from where he had been left to die; unable to pay for assistance since he had been robbed (I am currently without insurance until it kicks in from Joanie’s job); unable to call for help from those he knows since he is traveling and in a strange place apart from his family and circle of friends. I also understand the depth of gratitude he must feel toward the Samaritan man who helped him. When your are helpless and cannot get up, you are grateful for anyone and everyone who will lend you even the slightest care let alone pick you up and pay for your medical needs and recovery process.
So, I wish you one lower back strain. Not the pain but the pleasure. I wish you the joy of becoming interdependent and realizing what a great gift there is in leaning on others. I wish you a few days on the floor, not to get out of your job or school, but to give you some time to reflect on the goodness of God as he works through the concern and caring of others. And finally, I wish you that feeling of helplessness that you knew as a child that caused you to be dependant on your parents and that you will realize that God desires you to feel those same feelings toward Him – being dependant is what God calls “faith” in the Bible. And, we all need to have faith.

Distractions

For the first time in my life we have the Dish Network. We got it because, as an NFL fan, I wanted to get the NFL Ticket and be able to watch whatever football games I want whenever I want to watch them. When we arrived home from our son's wedding we found that the Dish was not working. That was yesterday. Today the technician arrived and fixed the Dish. Now we have TV.
It's amazing how much less I feel like I got done today because I could sit down and watch TV. TV is a distraction. That's what it is intended to be. It distracts you from the other things that should or could catch your attention. I have the tendency to come into the room and turn on the TV. It creates noise and, well, distracts me from day. Once distracted, I lose focus. Once I lose focus I become unproductive. Sound familiar?
Well, my new reality is that Joanie goes to work early in the morning and I get up early in the morning. What I am committed to do is to not turn on the TV until later in the day. I want to use my time wisely and productively. I don't need to be distracted from the needs of the day. I need to be focused.
What distracts you? What removes your focus? Do you get distracted by daydreams? How about worry? Do minute little details get your focus and you lose the big picture? Do you get caught up in other people's situations and fail to focus on the needs at hand? Sports? Shopping? Sleeping? The internet? Everyone struggles with their version of the Dish Network - Something that turns you away from what God and the priorities of the day would choose. What will you do about it? How will you overcome it? How you answer that will make all the difference in how you live your life and what you get done. Good luck. Focus!

Summing It All Up

At some point I am sure I will write the incredible story (in detail) of the wedding that took place on Sunday between our son, Jonathan, and his bride, Maria. I know every parent thinks that his or her child's wedding is the best, but I must say, the three weddings that I have officiated at for my three sons have been the most meaningful and joyous celebrations I have ever experienced at a wedding (and I've officiated at quite a few - over 100 for sure). Suffice it to say that the big surprise ending of the wedding was the story of what happened to Jonathan and Maria following the weeks after her surgery last August. It was my privilege to reveal that this fine young couple chose to get married last October in a private ceremony officiated by Maria's father and me so that they would not have to live together or do anything with their lives together that would compromise their values or their witness. However, that neither took away from nor diminished the wedding day. In many ways I believe it added to it - to make their witness complete. August 27th of 2006 became a marvelous triumph which redeemed the disastrous events of August 27th 2005. Instead of being a day of remembering what didn't happen and surgeries and all the rest, it now becomes a day of remembering what did take place and what has happened.
I believe that God has both the power and the desire to redeem the days for us. It took me many years before I could pass by a September 8th or a Valentines Day and not remember the death of my father or the funeral of my mother. But now, as time has passed, God has helped to heal the loss and redeem the days. What tragedy fills your calendar? What painful event remains a part of your internal clock so that, no matter what happens, you still remember it? Why not allow God to redeem the day? Plan some other celebration on that day or around that time that helps make the day a day or rejoicing instead of a day of sadness. Healing comes from God in many forms. Redemption is but one of them. Let God redeem your days.

Pain and Healing

I am so proud of my wife. She is an amazing woman with a heart as big as the outdoors. She has not only been 120% supportive of all the changes we are making in our lives so that I can go back to school, but she has also committed to taking on a full-time job so I can be a full-time student. How fortunate am I to have such support!
The only problem with this plan has been, well, two-fold. First, she doesn't have a job and all the prospects seem to be paying at a level that will not allow us to follow through on our "plan". Second, she has been in a great deal of pain. The doctors have given a number of theories from arthritis in her hips (the latest guess) to back problems to residual effects of her foot surgery two years ago (my theory). Whatever the diagnosis the pain has been so very real and she has sat down with tears in her eyes any number of times over the course of the last 2-3 weeks that we have been packing and preparing to move. How do I help her? What should I do to comfort this amazing partner who walks with such pain?
As we were packing Joanie received word that she was in the running for the teaching job at a Christian School in Gardena. Neither of us were sure that this was the answer to our prayers. We didn't know the salary or the commute distance. We didn't know if this was the right situation or the right place. And the pain kept coming. Could she be on her feet all day and teach if she was in such pain?
Two Sundays ago we went to church in Pasadena. During the service Joanie decided to just thank God for the job - not knowing whether she would get this one or not. Not knowing whether this was the job that God was leading her to receive. Then last Sunday, after taking the job, Joanie went to church and testified about how she had thanked God for a job last week and could now praise God because he had given her a job this week! And then an amazing thing happened. From Sunday onward she has been without pain in her hips and legs. From the time she testified about the job, she has been pain free.
Now, the cynics among us will say the pain was psychosomatic. Some will decry it was all in her head or that the medication the doctor gave her has finally kicked in or that it is just a coincidence. But Joanie would reply that she prayed for God to lead her to a job for many months. And when he did, she asked for the pain to be taken away so she could do the job that God led her to do. And now, she is walking normal and getting around without pain. To me, that sounds like God doing his work in his time with his power. I am naive enough to still believe that God heals. I am still practical enough to know that pain is one way that God uses to get our attention. In both cases, God is speaking. And Joanie, a wonderful and supportive soul who believes with all her heart, soul and mind has felt the touch of His hand and the healing that comes from on high. And I am rejoicing.

Final Pieces in the Puzzle

Have you ever noticed that when you put together a jigsaw puzzle there comes a point at which you can see the end and the pieces seem to start falling together quickly and with greater ease? It's like putting in the final few words of the crossword puzzle when you have half or more of the letters already in place. Life can be a little like that. At least, that's what seems to be happening to us. Let me explain.
Last week my wife and I moved to Pasadena, California. From Thursday to Saturday we packed boxes, unhooked cables, loaded the moving truck (four times - two to take things to storage and twice to take things to Pasadena). As we got to the final things in the house to pack, the work started to go faster and faster. While those several days were long and arduous, they seemed to move more quickly the closer we got to leaving Fresno behind and having Pasadena in the foreground.
After arriving at our new apartment, several friends (God bless all of them who helped us pack, load, and unload!) came to help us unpack the boxes it took us weeks to pack. We started with a huge pile of boxes in the living room (our thought was to place them all there and take them to each room for unpacking or storing). By the end of one day, the pyramid of boxes had disappeared into rooms, drawers, closets, and the spare room. Suddenly, we had a living room with furniture and a television and lamps and a place to sit and relax. As the day wore on, we found that the boxes seem to disappear with greater speed than they did at the beginning.
Today, as I visited with my son and his fiance (they are getting married next weekend) I received a call from my lovely wife telling me that she has found a job. This was the last piece of the puzzle for us in this more than year long process of preparing to follow God's leading to the place God wanted us to be. Joanie has found a job as a music teacher at a Christian School in the L.A. area. She was "discovered" by sending out a resume. They found it very impressive and ended up interviewing only her. She has the job. It will pay well enough for us to live on for the next year (or more, if she likes it). It is near the ocean (hmmm, maybe we will move closer to the school she teaches in and let me commute to the seminary - oh, no, that would involve moving, again!). It is an answer to prayer. It has full medical benefits for her and adding me on will not cost too much (I have to have medical insurance in order to be a student at the seminary). Just as all the other avenues seemed to be shutting down and we weren't sure where the funds would come from to allow us to live, God provided a way. And, just like the jigsaw puzzle, the pieces have come together with amazing speed and quickness.
If you are in one of those times in life where none of the puzzle pieces seem to be fitting together, you may want to step back and take a look at the bigger picture. After all, when they do start falling, the domino affect will cause things to speed up and you might just miss the joy of seeing how God works.

The Edge of Adventure

Some years ago, Bruce Larson wrote a book called, "The Edge of Adventure". I never really understood the full meaning of the title - until today. You see, for the last 31 years I have been the pastor of a local congregation. (I spent nearly 10 months out of the pastorate some 12 years ago but, during that hiatus, I always felt like I would be returning to a pastorate somewhere). Today, I have spent the first Sunday in my adult life believing that I will probably never return to a local pastorate. Anything is possible, and I will not suggest that I will never be a pastor of a local church again, but I feel like the possibility is remote. I have begun a new chapter of my life with little knowledge of what lies ahead. The next four years will be in the library and in the classroom. Research and writing - that is my lot for the next four years. I look forward to it with release and abandon. It is a chapter I have been waiting two decades to write.
What are you waiting for? What is the dream you hope to see happen? What adventure lies ahead of you? I kept thinking about Elijah today. He has been in my thoughts for more than a year now. He marched into the palace, confronted King Ahab, gave the Word of the Lord that no rain would fall until he came back and said, "Thus saith the Lord". Then he walked out of the palace into an unknown future. Apparently, he didn't even know where he was to go. Sometimes, that is the exact place that God desires that we should be - in a place that has a future, but that future is unknown to everyone except God. God had ravens at the ready, babbling brooks full of fresh water, and plenty of food to be brought to Elijah at the brook. All of which Elijah did not know. He delivered a message and walked into an unknown future and knew he was living in the Will of God. In a world where comfort and control are highly prized, being in a place where you have neither is undesirable. Unless God leads you into that place.
Nearly 10 months ago, Joanie and I sensed that God was leading us into a time in our lives where the future would be uncertain and our need to have faith in the God of the Future would necessarily have to increase. We sensed that the greatest times of our lives where ones in which our dependence on God was high and our knowledge of the future was low. Living dependently was, for us, living on the edge of faith (or, maybe, in the center of faith). It was highly desirable. And so, today, we ventured into life without knowing the future. Living a different life than that of the last 31 years. Scary? Nah. Exciting. You bet. This is what I have come to understand it means to live on "The Edge of Adventure".